Two Crazy Beautiful Years

I cannot believe in just a few short weeks I will have a two year old. I wanted to take a few moments and share about my last two years and the things I have learned from them. It has been the hardest two years of my life, but they have also been my favorite years as well. And it’s not just because we added a child to the picture. No, it also includes, moving overseas, spending one entire summer living in six different places, packing up our whole lives into nine small boxes, saying good-bye to family, and diving head first into a new culture. Oh, and jetlag. But that’s another story.

And I have slept less and I’m not caught up on the TV shows I used to watch and certainly haven’t a clue about what has been happening at the movie theater. And I have had food poisoning (twice), had morning sickness, and went through labor and breastfeeding. But I have grown so much as a person and I wouldn’t change it at all. I have had more joyous and happy moments than I have in other years and my heart is so incredibly full. So without further introduction: What I have learned in the past two years.

I’ve learned that family will always be there. No matter how far the distance and no matter how long it is in between visits. I’ve also learned that family isn’t just the people who you are related too.

I’ve learned to not worry so much about money. Sometimes you don’t know how everything is going to work out. But I’ve also learned not to look back and try to figure it out…because it does work out, and most of the time it doesn’t make sense.

I’ve learned that I can in fact live without Target and Chickfila. And no, my friends, this isn’t a joke.

I’ve learned that it’s ok to cry. Even if there isn’t something specific to cry about or even if there is. It’s far worse to hold it inside, trying to be strong. Because eventually the tears will come, whether you like it or not, and it won’t be quite as pretty.

I’ve learned that learning a new language is tough. I’ve learn to celebrate the little accomplishments of learning a language instead of looking at the big picture. Because the big picture seems impossible. And you might just give up if you don’t celebrate the little things.

I’ve learned a whole lot about what it means to be patient, and how I wasn’t patient at all before little feet ran around my home.

I’ve learned that you can substitute almost anything when it comes to cooking. There are countless ways to get around ingredients when you live in a country that doesn’t have them.

I’ve learned that love gets oh so much stronger when you share beautiful moments together. Our little family has never been this close and this in love, and it’s because of the moments we have been through, good and bad, over the past two years.

I’ve learned that it’s never easy to do the right thing. Like a big move, or breastfeeding, or waking up in the middle of the night to feed a hungry baby. Just to name a few.

I’ve learned that most of life does not turn out exactly like you had planned it to. And I have also learned that it is perfectly ok for that to be true.

And this is just a small look into what I have learned. I know even as I am pressing the publish button on this posting I will think of another thing I should have added. But that’s ok. It’s been an amazing two years. I am partly sad to see it pass, but oh so excited to see what the future has for us. So, here’s to yet another beautiful year, full of new adventures and discoveries.

Enjoying The Moment.

Today was one of those days that I miss America.

I have these periods of days or sometimes even a week or more where I actually think to myself it would be better to go home.

Go home to cars and American grocery stores and mommy play groups and church nurseries and English.

Maybe it’s because in a way we are still very much into the thick of culture shock or because I can’t seem to get my act together but whatever the reason may be I have these days. And these days are brought on because I am tired of riding my bike everywhere, especially in the cold. Tired of saying no to doing things because we can’t afford it. Tired of hearing Japanese constantly around me, everywhere I go. Tired of watching my son say good-bye to family after wonderful, happy visits. Tired of not understanding the culture and making countless embarrassing mistakes. Tired of being an outsider. Sometimes I feel so alone. Sometimes I just feel tired. Sometimes I almost hate living here.

Sometime I feel like everything we gave up back home wasn’t worth giving up for where we are now. And it’s times like these that leaves me missing America and longing for what it has to offer me.

But I think this is kind of what happens to me whenever we close one chapter of life and open a new. The grass was greener on the other side. I can easily remember the good times and have a harder time remembering the struggles we have had in the past. But it’s the opposite it seems when looking at the present sometimes.

I can see the struggles of right now, because I do not know where these struggles are going to lead me. Or how long I will be dealing with them. And these struggles can overtake the best parts of the now.

Things like getting to actually watch my son grow up from home instead of having to work. Things like exciting cultural experiences and new understandings of life itself. Things like getting to experience parts of the world that many people don't.Things like watching God work in our lives in ways we couldn't imagine from our couch in America.

And if I am not careful, I will miss it. And that would be a very sad thing.

It doesn't mean it's not ok to look back on my past and smile. We've had some great memories in the past few years. But I am working on not missing the present. Because there will be a time in the future where I will be longing for this moment once again.

A Different Kind of Normal

I had conversation with a women I met today at our local grocery store. We ran into each other because our children looked to be the same age and we both looked like we understood English. We got to talking and it was the typical where are you from etc. that you have when you meet someone over here.

It wasn’t a special conversation, just two people jumping at the opportunity to speak English. But during her introduction she mentioned that they were a pretty normal family.

Normal?

I laughed inside because I have no idea what that means anymore.
What does it mean to be normal?


Well, I can tell you what my normal was two years ago. It included squeezing as many people into our little seminary duplex as we can fit to watch our favorite American TV show, taking several trips a week to the grocery store and easily finding everything I need at a price I was willing to pay, driving my Hyundai around town whenever I needed to, spending the afternoon teaching children afterschool things like sports and how to draw, sleeping in until who knows how long because I didn’t need to be at work until two, meeting friends at restaurants like Chickfila, Chipotle and Pei Wei. That was my normal.

I can assure you that is not my normal now.


Life has changed drastically for me in the past few years. What is my normal now? My normal is riding my bike down a busy highway with my son riding on the back when we need to go anywhere, balancing five bags of groceries on my bike coming home from the grocery store, using crowded public transit systems to get anywhere that I cannot bike to, crowding as many people in our 500 square foot apartment as we can so we can enjoy each other’s company and have a meal together (ok, so we’ve been doing that a long time), chasing around a busy 22 month old beginning at 7am every morning, visiting import stores in hopes to find the one thing you are craving from home, hearing Japanese around me constantly and wishing so much that I could speak it and doing ridiculous hand movements to try to get someone to understand what you need. Tatami floors and complicated trash pick up. That is my normal.


And it sounds crazy to the typical person. Why on earth would anyone want to do that?

We could both have 9 to 5 jobs in a 1500 square foot home.We could have a backyard, with a dog. We could settle into a place and get comfortable.


But for me, that sounds crazy. For me that isn’t normal. And I like it that way.
Our life screams adventure and new experiences. It stretches us so thin sometimes that we have nothing else to do but to watch God provide, and oh He does. It makes us think harder, learn quicker and love more. And I wouldn’t want it any other way.

I love our normal. Our normal is beautiful to me.

A Lesson From Dr. Pepper.

When you are a new expat in a strange place far from home like I was last August, an import store can be just what you need to be your lifeline to the familiar land of America. Having those staples of an American diet like block cheese, popcorn, and Dr. Pepper can really energize you when you’ve gone weeks staring at grocery items like odorous raw squids and whole aisles of various tofu products. We have an import store about a 15-minute bike ride away called Yamaya where we can get all of the aforementioned American items just about any time we have a craving for them . . . or so I thought. Last week I waltzed in and strolled over to the beverage aisle to realize that there weren’t any Dr. Peppers on the shelf in their usual spot. In fact, the place where they go on the shelf was completely gone! Will they ever return? I don’t know, but I sure hope they do. My favorite popcorn has been gone for three weeks and counting . . .

In reality, most of the American items you find at a typical Japanese import store are only there until the store decides to stop carrying them. You never know from one trip to the next if that one food item that really gets you through the rough times is even going to be there. I have learned to appreciate these American products while they are available to me, but I don’t take them for granted and I don’t foolishly believe they’ll always be available. Those are just the facts of life when it comes to imported items in Japan.

I think this was what Paul was getting at in his letter to the Philippians when he implored the Christians in Philippi to be content in whatever conditions they find themselves. Paul throughout his ministry had times in which he was treated well and was safe and had enough to eat and a warm place to lay his head. But he said he learned not to expect these things to be there forever; he knew that one night he could be dining at a rich man’s table and the next he could have to be lowered out a window in order to escape persecution. He knew the words of Job well when Job declared “the Lord gives and the Lord takes away, but no matter the circumstance, let the name of the Lord be blessed.”

I hope that I can take the lesson of the Dr. Peppers and apply it to my life in a broader sense. The things that the Lord gives to us are just things, no matter how nice they are and no matter how much you attach yourself to them. It’s best if we use them in a positive way to impact His kingdom, but even if we do they are still only temporary. We might enjoy them for a season, but we can’t expect any earthly thing to be there forever (nor should we). I have learned (and am still learning) to live with that reality. It really does free up your mind to care about more pressing matters and attach yourself to more important things in life.

Last year at this time, I owned two cars; now I own none. Last year I didn’t have a bicycle; now I have a great one. He gives; He takes away. Let the name of the Lord be blessed.

-JP-

Thoughts About Bike Riding.

This past week in Nagoya, we experienced four consecutive days of rainy weather. In America, I never fretted the rain too much because I knew the most I’d have to suffer through would be a quick jaunt from the house to my car or from my car into a store. The car that I was privileged to have shielded me from even the harshest of weather conditions outside. The weather in my car, without fail, was always a climate-controlled 70 degrees with no rain.

Since moving to Japan, however, I have lost the luxury of using a car for my daily transportation needs. All that remains is my trusty Giant (brand) bicycle to take me to and from wherever I wish to go. With this reality comes the additional reality of losing the power of “climate-control” that we all love so much about our cars. Now, I must tolerate whatever weather conditions come my way, be it rain, sleet, snow, hail or anything in between. This means that I have had to ride miles a day through heavy snow, across icy sidewalks and streets, through absolute downpours, into 30 mile per hour headwinds uphill, through freezing rainstorms, and with any number of tumultuous conditions the atmosphere chooses to send my way. But any fair analysis of the reality of bike riding has to also touch upon the positive aspects of this unpredictable mode of transportation. On a bicycle, I get to see the gorgeous Japanese sky as it changes from summer and autumn to winter and spring then back again. I get to experience cool, crisp autumn breezes, the gourmet aromas of restaurants pouring out their front doors as I pedal by, sublimely perfect spring days when the sunshine is just enough to warm your face and the breeze just cool enough to offset the heat of the sun. Those are days on which bike riding is truly joyful.

It’s true that by having a car I could avoid all those wet, snowy, and otherwise contemptible weatherconditions. But by hiding away within the climate-controlled comfort of my car, I would miss those crispautumn breezes, the aromas, the warmth of the spring sun, and the other little joys that I experiencwhile riding my bicycle through the city. The spiritual parallel I think is this: it is easy to give into the temptation to take control of your life as a Christian and try to create a “climate-controlled” life foryourself that is comfortable and protected from the unknowns of the world in which we live. Can you insulate yourself from many of life’s dangers, challenges, and uncertainties? Sure you can, to a certain degree. But by building that comfortable shelter around yourself, you are also shutting out some of the glories of a life you could be leading had you not insulated yourself from the unknown. And, to be sure, a life submitted to the will of God and without your constant micromanaging is one that will be unknown to you. I never know from week to week just what type of weather I’ll be pedaling through, but I’d surely never give up those periodically amazing days out of fear of a spot of rain every once in a while. So goes bike riding, and so goes a life submitted to God.

-Justin

Our Lettuce Garden.

We were going through the normal routine of getting drinks and snacks and food for Noah at the drug store near our house when something caught my eye as we were going inside. Beautiful potted flowers. I just had to take a look. And in the bottom right hand corner of the flower area I saw three small green plants. And then I realized they were red leaf lettuce. And then I saw the price tag.

Whoa. That's a great price. So I went around the store, priced out how much it would cost to buy a pot, some soil, and some fertilizer and I realized it was only going to cost me a little over 500 yen (6 bucks). Now with the prices of food in this country I was so excited to give this a try. So Noah and I loaded up our new treasures into his stroller and headed home.


I was like a kid on Christmas when we got home. Excited about letting Noah play in the dirt for the time and excited that I just might have found a way to save (just a little) money for our family. I put Noah in an old onesie, swept our back porch off and we set out to work.


Noah had never been on the back porch before because it has been so cold here. So the minute I opened the sliding glass door and motioned for him to go out he took off like a race horse for the door. He was so excited he was allowed to go out. I took the pot, prepared the bottom of it and then poured in the soil and then let Noah touch it. At first he was reluctant to do anything with it. Then he touched it with one finger. And then I had to practically dive to stop him from sticking his whole face in the dirt to see what it tastes like. About 30 minutes later I sat with my son, both of us filthy dirty but extremely happy, as we both looked at our new little addition to our back porch: our lettuce garden

My Baking Disaster.

I love to cook.

I enjoy it so much. I love mixing different sauces and spices together and coming up with something new and delicious. But baking on the other hand is not my strong point. I can do it if it is a pre-mix, packaged, all the ingredients but eggs and water are already in there kind of baking. But from scratch baking? Yeah, you better ask someone else to bake it for you.

We were having a dessert party with a group of ICAN teachers. It was probably for a holiday or something. I can't quite remember what it was for. We had all signed up to bring something. I decided I was going to make some kind of dessert bread, pretty much like I always do when desserts are to be brought to a party.


Why you ask? Because they are easy. You just throw a bunch of ingredients together, mix them up and put them in a bread pan. Ok, there are a few more steps than that but you get my point. They are very hard to mess up. Unless.....

You can't read the labels of products at the grocery store.

I was running late. Noah was in one of his "I'm going to scream and cry because I'm kind of bored" moments. So in a rush I ran into the baking aisle to grab my ingredients.

Flour. Check. Brown Sugar. Check. Sugar. Check.

I had everything I needed. I rushed to the checkout line so I could get out of the store as quickly as possible since we were already being stared at for the dramatic fit my sweet boy was throwing. I paid, bagged my groceries and headed home on my bike.

I got home and started baking immediately. I put everything in that the recipe called for and as usual I took a sampling of the batter, which in my opinion can taste even better than the bread itself. I put my sampling in my mouth and I couldn't believe what I was tasting. It was awful. Actually, awful is being generous. It was beyond disgusting. In fact, there are no words to describe the horrible taste I had in my mouth. As Noah sat on the floor laughing at my reaction to the mess, I was pretty sure I knew exactly what was wrong. I had bought salt instead of sugar.

Later on in the day, when I had eaten enough other things to get the gross taste out of my mouth and Noah was sleeping soundly, I had to think about what I could get out of this mess to help change my thinking.

And it came down to this simple fact.

This bread batter that I made looked so delicious, I was convinced that it was going to be as delicious as ever. But it wasn't because something I put into the mix just wasn't right.

And salt is good, in the right amount and in the right recipes. Salt can make something taste extremely delicious. But too much of it or in the wrong place can lead to an unpleasant taste in your mouth.


So I had to think, what is the salt in my life right now?

Mine was (and still is) most definitely the internet. The internet helps me in so many ways. I find recipes for dinners, figure out the "how-to's" of raising a child, communicate with my family back home, etc. But when I spend hours on the internet when there are other things that need to be done around me (AKA: play with Noah, wash the dishes, my quiet time) it can become something that isn't so good very quickly.

What is the salt in your life right now?

Oh, the Joys of a Care Package.

I was having a rough day. It seemed like no matter what I did nothing felt right.

I didn't want to hear another word in Japanese.
I didn't want to eat Japanese food.
I didn't want to spend another paycheck just on the necessary groceries we needed.
I didn't want to live so far from family any more.

I just wanted to get in a car that I called my own, order a chicken nugget meal at Chick-fil-a in English and go grocery shopping at Target (oh, how I miss Target) so I could bring home a weeks worth of groceries for fifty bucks.

I wanted to go home.

As I was having my moment of frustration, the doorbell rang. I opened it and there stood a small Japanese man with two large packages. He held out his hand that held a clipboard and motioned for me to sign.

I was so excited. I knew EXACTLY what this was. It was some love from back home from my mother-in-law. This was EXACTLY what I needed today.

The three of us huddled around excitedly to see what part of the United States was waiting for us in this box. What kind of things my mother-in-law spent time picking out for us, what kind of things we would cherish for some time.

She blessed us with a bunch of clothing for Noah. I was so happy to have American style clothing in his size. Some underthings for me (ok, I didn't bring near enough when I moved here), some things for my hubby and some of our favorite American candy.

Noah Sporting One of His New Outfits.

This instantly changed my mood.

I was happy to be loved on like this from a family member.
Happy to have something to remind me of home.
Happy to have this reminder that we have amazing people back home who love us this much.

If you have a family member overseas for whatever reason and you want to show them love and bless them with something that would really mean a lot to them, you might want to consider a care package.

Tips for Sending a Care Package Overseas

*Make sure you check with the person you are sending the care package to about anything you should NOT send them in the package. There are things that customs might not let into the country or would be suspicious of if they opened the box. Cash is NEVER a good thing to send overseas in a care package.

*Make sure you have a gift for each person that you send the care package to. This let's them know that not only were you thinking of the family as a whole but each one of them has a special place in your heart.

*Pictures from home are great to keep them updated on what is going on back home. A picture of their niece's ballet recital, your last birthday event, etc. It means a lot when you keep families away from home in the loop.

*Email or ask the family if there is anything they really miss that they can't get where they are living. You'd be amazed how much a jar of peanut butter is worth to the person who can't find it anywhere where they live.

*By far the cheapest way to send care packages to most countries is through the US Postal Service's International Priority Flat-rate Boxes. Check out www.usps.com for more information.

For even more great ideas on care packaging tips check out this website here.

Let it Snow! Let it Snow! Let it Snow!

I know, I know, I know. It is January. Christmas is over and I really should not be using a Christmas song as my blog title, especially since one of my own pet peeves is celebrating Christmas when it's not Christmas. But today I couldn't help but hum that song in my head.

This morning when I opened the curtains to let the sunshine in as I do every morning I was surprised to see that it was snowing outside!

Wonderful, beautiful snow.

Now bear with me because although I have seen snow, snow skied, and have actually had one white Christmas while we lived in Fort Worth, I am a Florida girl. No doubt about it. I get excited at even the smallest amount of sleet that falls down from the sky because I have no idea what it is like to live in a place where it snows constantly during the winter.

But today there was enough snow to bundle my 10 month old up and go outside to let my baby boy experience something new.



I love watching Noah experience something new. His eyes light up and his mouth opens and then he starts kicking and jumping up and down in my arms. It is the most precious thing. And today I got to enjoy one of those days as he laughed and giggled at the snow falling down all around us. Of course he instantly started trying to catch the snowflakes and when he finally did get a few in his hands I could see the shock in his face when he realized how cold the snow was. It made my day.

This is one of the many sweet moments I have experienced since becoming a mom.



What are some joyful moments that you have experienced with your children?